There’s something about the ocean that has always called me. And when I became a mum, that call didn’t disappear—it just got a little quieter, buried under nappies, feedings, and all the little (and big) changes. I used to paddle out to clear my head. Now, I paddle out to remember who I am in a storm of different identities. But, I know I am not the only one, so this one is for you: all of you postpartum surfing mums.
How surf wasn´t even on my mind that first month
In the early days postpartum, surfing wasn’t even on my radar, which I didn´t expect because in the last two months of my pregnancy I had been slightly jealously looking at all the surfers in the water, not being able to wait until I could go back out there.
But then again, honestly, nothing really was on my radar that first month. Between sleepless nights and trying to figure out this new tiny human, the idea of getting myself into a wetsuit was not really in it. I somehow trusted that the ocean was still there, patiently waiting for me.
However, when my midwife cleared me ´good to go´ at one month post-partum, I also know I wanted to touch the sea as soon as possible. Deciding to go back at it using my longboard, there I went.
The first session back: humbling, to say the least
I chose a small, mellow day, perfect for my longboard. Heverton stayed out on the beach with Inoa and gave me the nessesary moral support. Honestly? It was awkward. My timing was off, my body felt different, I had zero adominal muscles and I was a little nervous about my endurance. But then, I caught a wave. Just one. And it felt like I had rediscovered a part of myself I thought I’d lost.
The first couple of times I went out surfing again, it wasn’t about performance or getting back to where I was—it was about being there again, present in the moment. I sat in the lineup, feeling the waves and letting the ocean remind me who I am (although, of course, after some months, the moment came where I started getting all kinds of expectations again of myself of what I should be capable of doing. Don´t fall in that mind-trap all you other mama´s)
The fear that hit me later
Here’s the thing no one told me: the biggest mindset shift didn’t happen right after birth. It hit months later, and still now.. 20 months post-partum. Once the fog lifted a bit and I started feeling physically strong again, I thought I’d jump right back into the water like before. But something had changed. I am more hesitant. Cautious in a way I’d never been before. I keep thinking: What if I get hurt out there? What if I hit my head on the board, or get caught inside?
Because now, it’s not just about me anymore. There’s this little person who needs me more than anything. And with that comes this massive, invisible weight of responsibility that is so new to me (adding to that the fact that I work as a freelancer).
Some days I paddle out and feel strong, centered, even powerful. Other days I second-guess everything and don’t even catch a wave (then again, I think every woman can relate to this, as our literal own cycles and waves affect us differently, but I will save that for another blog post). Both days are valid.
Motherhood hasn’t erased the surfer in me. It’s just added layers: of responsibility, of caution, of depth. And when I finally do catch a wave, the joy is wilder, richer, harder-earned. And therefore I want to say:
To the postpartum surfing mums holding back
If you’re scared to go back in the water—physically, emotionally, or logistically—you’re not alone. You’re not less of a surfer. You’re not “soft.” You’re evolving.
The ocean will wait for you. And when you’re ready, it’ll welcome you back—shaky legs, surf-mama brain, tears, laughter and all.
I’d love to hear your story. Are you one of the postpartum surfing mums? Or are you still waiting for the right moment? Let’s talk about it in the comments or shoot me a message.
Ah, and are you ready, but don´t know where to go? Check out my blog on the best family-friendly sufing spots.
Do you want to ready how I continued surfing during my pregnancy, check out this blog I wrote for surfgirls.nl
